I Still Go A Little Crazy But These Days I don’t Stay Too Long 

Some believe art is science some believe there is in an art in science 

People pushin’ beliefs down throats, riots, ceremonies, hate speeches, all held in defiance    

Better hope your desires coincide with Gods will 

Decency, kindness, good values and manners, something we still can’t seem to instill 

Mind creating scenarios that breaks my own heart time and time again  

It’s all too much but also not enough 

Look around, see the grime, the cigarette burns, the dust and the handy me down furniture, the mess. Is this what I wanted to be when I grew up? 

Mama, where did that goofy little kid go 

The one with the hopes and desires 

Grew up and realised the world is full of hate and bad liars  

I still go a little crazy but these days I don’t stay too long  

Found but I don’t know where I am 

I get it now, but 

Mere understanding does not chase away the hurt  

Die a little every day and get reborn into a different me 

I am not sleeping on concrete porch floors under the indigo sky with the smell of stale cigarettes and whiskey for company anymore 

I’m not punching fists through walls or hitting my head off a door when it strays  

I don’t sit there for hours with nothing but everything spiraling around my head, in a daze  

Time discovered me safely destroyed  

Those broken pieces I’ve been trying to pick up are what made me whole this whole time 

“We all build internal sea walls to keep at bay the sadnesses of life and the often overwhelming forces within our minds. In whatever way we do this—through love, work, family, faith, friends, denial, alcohol, drugs, or medication—we build these walls, stone by stone, over a lifetime. One of the most difficult problems is to construct these barriers of such a height and strength that one has a true harbor, a sanctuary away from crippling turmoil and pain, but yet low enough, and permeable enough, to let in fresh seawater that will fend off the inevitable inclination toward brackishness.” 
― Kay Redfield Jamison, An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness 

If you are interested in reading about a variety of different subjects such as mental health, inside the minds of disturbed artists, the importance of being an introvert, importance of body language and non-verbal communication, the importance of mental rehearsal and imagery, the power of our minds, mindfulness, metaphysics and the cosmic world and how all the great genius’ of the past have tapped into this power to achieve seeming miracles, addiction, abuse, the effects loneliness and so much more, please check out some of my other posts: